October 2015

Brain Picker…Flower Picker…Nit Picker!

October 27, 2015 / / Life and Living

This is coming off the top of my salt ‘n pepper head!

I’m always introspecting something, that’s just me!  I wake up every morning with an abounding energy that lasts until around 11:30 A.M.  If I’m going to get anything done it has to be done before then…..thinking included.

This morning during my brain picking, for some reason I equated it to flower picking!  When I pick flowers, NEVER would I consider choosing dead or wilting flowers for my bouquet.  Yet, when I’m thinking I don’t even think twice about whether or not I want to pick up a good memory or a bad one or a ‘story’ that isn’t even reality, which I call “worry”!

Sometimes I zero in on ‘Other’:  Anyone else in memory shot…. Inner  or Outer Circle, no matter.   This direction of thinking brings me to focusing on others’  business – not my business – and before I know it, I can unwittingly conjure  a litany of issues – again, not my business – that apparently I’d rather dwell upon than turn my thoughts around and nit pick myself and my business!

My brain is an indiscriminating fertile ground of information…not necessarily facts…and if I don’t stay on top of what I take from it when I’m sourcing my introspection, I can bring myself off track and ultimately cause myself undue emotional discord and before I know it I’ve used up perfectly good energy that provides no pleasure to me, nor does it extend my spiritual learning curve!  In fact, it is destructive and undermining to my integrity and the person I want to be.

This is another definition of living (and thinking) mindfully!

I’m going to do a better job of nipping my thoughts in the bud (no pun intended).

Life is a bouquet to my senses:  A perfume that permeates my Soul when I supply the mindful groundwork, and a fresh gathering of beautiful thoughts that I cultivate, fertilize and tend, so the  bountiful feelings of Peace, Gratitude, Joy, Love, and Presence to my own Life and my own World will always be in perfect order.

Tulips

Beautiful Thoughts For The Picking

 

My Intrinsic Greatness…..My Authentic Self……

October 15, 2015 / / Life and Living

Dedicated to the removal of Self-Doubt

When I continually  feel the resonance of Peace and  Calmness within me…When I conscientiously conduct myself with poise, posture and humility never to disgrace myself or another… When facing an adversary I acknowledge  “it doesn’t matter to me or my life…it matters to that life” and believe it ….When it is no longer necessary to raise my voice out of weakness…When a scale does not set the standard of my self-esteem or self-worth…When I stop looking outside myself for my answers…When I trust myself and have unequivocal self-reliance and Faith which dictate my decision making…When I don’t shrink from my responsibilities to myself or anyone else…When I recognize I need help and turn to the source for that help… When I know I feel love sincerely for all fellow human beings and freely demonstrate these feelings by extending my hand in friendship and caring for their welfare…When I thrill to the notion of living life with abandon, albeit responsibly and self-confidently.…When I stop dreading anything,  knowing I will never face the imagined Kodiak Bear!… When I am always in awe of the Magnificence of the Universe and my place in it…  When I take my daily steps  into the unknown,  deliberately planting my feet with anticipation, excitement, wonder and  welcoming affirmation toward whatever unfolds, knowing and accepting all is ultimately for my best good and growth…When I thank everyone  from my past  and  current experiences again and again for the opportunities that have been afforded me just for the taking, and By the Grace of God…When all of my words and actions are inspired by my  generous heart with no reservations nor expectations…When the words “doubt”, “can’t”, “never”, “always” “hate” or any other word of negativity, restriction, dissatisfaction or judgmentalness  are  passé to me…When at the end of each day I look forward  to bowing my head in humility and integrity, honoring my Creator and being Thankful for the Privilege of Doing My Best Every Day Of My Life to ‘OUR’ SATISFACTION…And, finally…to paraphrase Patrick Overton:

When I come to the edge of all of the light I have, and must take a step into the darkness of the unknown, I will believe that one of two things will happen:  Either there will be something solid for me to stand on – or I will be taught how to fly!

I AM THAT I AM.

I AM THAT I AM.

 

What “Could” Happen, “IF”……

October 13, 2015 / / Life and Living

Black and White Thinker!  I can’t deny it has always been easy for me to make it an “either/or” situation.  Life seemed to be so much tidier when I  wrapped it up in a neat bow of ‘cut and dried!’

Today, life  is more than adding the ‘Gray” word.  The inclusion of “Could” and “If” can expand everything.  If I use more words of positivity, there could be more possibility thinking.

If I could  look at things ‘another way’; that is, if I allow my eyes to see that clearly,  I will need a huge dose of patience and insight because without it, there could be less room for open-mindedness and clarity of thought.

Thoughtfulness before verbal expression!  This requires me to slow down and  choose my words carefully.  When I am around others,  I want to extend my sincere interest and support, compassion, understanding, uplifting mindfulness and deliberate effort.   I want my presence to be celebrated not tolerated (to quote a dear friend).

If I want to make a positive difference in my world,  I choose to take  a more-give-and-less-take view,  and not  focus on how big a difference I make, but instead, consider if I Could make any helpful and positive difference at all!

Living alone, making my own rules within my four walls, has unwittingly provided fertile ground  for close-mindedness and minimal consideration of other viewpoints and ideas.   I want to expand my thinking as I move toward continuous personal growth.

Life is anything but Black, Gray and White! It’s a kaleidoscopic blend of love, faith, hope, dreams, goals, joy, gratitude, wisdom, harmony, sadness, gladness, expectation and disappointment within all of us…… in this Whole Wide World.

The Beauty of Life

The Beauty of Life

So, I Said To Myself,”…..You Talkin’ To Me?!….”

October 9, 2015 / / Life and Living

Yakety Yak!…… YaDaYaDaYaDa!…..  For more years than I’d care to admit, I’ve been talking to myself aloud – and enjoying these conversations – one-sided as they are!    My subject matter is mostly generic and scripted, i.e., “You’re not lookin’ bad at all for 78!” or “What are we planning to do today?”, or “You did a good job at that!”, etc.   My discovery of  late is  I haven’t taken advantage of the REAL opportunity this nebulous activity offers me below the surface of my emotions!

I’m mindful of a kind of “Self-Talk” that emits negative messages that scar and cripple the Spirit..always pulling the Self down at every chance!  The words of self-loathing, disrespecting the Self so deeply, it cannot love or be loved, often spiraling downward to  ultimate  despair and loneliness and pain of Heart.   When I consider  my issues that need healing, it makes good sense for me to use all this ‘lonely energy’ and deliberately CHOOSE TRUTHFUL CONTENT for the  MESSAGES I’M GIVING TO MY  ‘SELF’ and transform these  conversations into  healing nuggets that can strengthen and give me peace.

CHOICE AND CONTENT

I know  I am essentially Good.  I  know that I am not lesser than any other human being.   If I feel otherwise, I am lying to myself!  Until now,  I have allowed myself to remain misguided, instead of correcting my thoughts or feelings that promote discomfort and  dis-ease.   The truth is,  such feelings are baseless…they are lies with a life of their own inside me,  which will continue to wreak havoc on my future peace, joy and happiness,  until I examine my dialogue  and, when necessary, root these untruths out and replace them with honest, supportive  commentary.

 I will  strive to have only affirmative ‘Self discussions’ with deliberate intent!   After all, who knows me better than ME!

There is no time like the present and I am ready!    On My Mark…Get Set…GO!

 I’LL BE COMING ‘ROUND THE CORNER FROM THE INSIDE….BUT AT THE FINISH LINE I’LL BE ON THE OUTSIDE!

Power lines on a blue sky

Can I Hear Me?  Can I Hear Me?

                         

 

By Hook Or By Crook, I Want Off!

October 6, 2015 / / Life and Living

“Get The Hook!”    This is an old expression from the vaudevillian era that was introduced in 1903….just in time for my ‘entrance’ in 1937, I’d say!

Novice performers would appear on “amateur night” competitions  and when their performances were unacceptable, the audience would scream, “Get the Hook”, and a long hook would protrude from behind the curtain and pull the performer off the stage.   A Saving Grace I think.

I’ve spent a good share of my life ‘on stage’, performing for whomever was captive at the time!  Such physical and emotional stress!… a set-up for criticism and ridicule!… a distraction from myself and whom I was really meant to be!… a pathetic way to behave and misdirect my life!… a bewildering result that has, until this very acknowledgment,  befuddled my authenticity!

NOW, by the same Saving Grace, I am grasping my own hook, and pulling myself off the stage of showiness….ostentatious subtle and not-so-subtle rude and sarcastic witty repartee… “acts” manifesting low self-esteem, fearing rejection, feelings of unworthiness, loneliness and much more.  I want to look at myself in the  mirror of self-imposed honesty and search out and destroy the last remnants  of feeling “lesser than” still residing within me.

Make no mistake, there are areas of my life where I’m extremely competent, self-confident, and have a healthy dose of self-worth and value.    Along life’s way I’ve proven to be successfully self-reliant in handling challenges offered me.  I won’t speculate on the feelings which generate my determination to improve myself.   The “Whys” don’t matter.   Recognizing my desire to heal what I can, and creating my Renaissance Self as I become more authentic, is my goal.

I’m not looking for any overnight miracles.  It feels not unlike what a ‘Selfie’ might reveal if I had my hand caught in the cookie jar!  No need… nor sense… to deny it, and I’ve discovered  my eyes hardly burn anymore as I continue to peel my onion!

El fin Die Ende Einde La Fin ha sikum The End?

El fin
Die Ende
Einde
La Fin
ha sikum
The End!

It’s Funny How This “Honesty Thing” Works!

October 1, 2015 / / Life and Living

I have found out that the more I share  my life’s experience, the more others can relate to me.  We all have the same feelings, only the circumstances causing these feelings may be different.  I’ll call this “striking life’s chords” – and this kind of music that plays can bring me closer together with my fellow man.  It’s the ‘similarity’ not the ‘difference’ that’s meaningful.

I have a story:  When I was in my early twenties, I am ashamed to say I had very little respect for  fellow human beings!  I guess I was in high survivorship mode, and  I don’t claim any awards for my temperament nor the sarcasm that came out of my mouth.

By the Grace of God my lawyer, who was also my mentor in those years,  recognized my disparity and  extended his hand in friendship and faith in me, and made a simple request:  For a week, spend at least 5 minutes with whomever I spoke   –   an elevator operator (yes, this was way back when) , a cashier at the check-out,  someone standing on the corner waiting for the bus or street car,  a fellow passenger, and especially the file clerk in my office whom he had heard about more than enough!  He assured me after this experience, I would report each conversation had been interesting to me,   would come away with valuable  knowledge about each person with whom I spoke, and I would thoroughly have enjoyed  the time spent.  HE WAS ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!   After this life changing exercise,  I slowly began seeing, hearing, respecting, learning from and VALUING others.  This was not an overnight success!   I had lived twenty-some years in a selfish and ignorant darkness. It has taken me many years  – experiencing ups and downs, failures and successes –  to begin to define the life pathway I am carefully and intentionally choosing for myself today.

As I have shared this story with you, I am again  extremely grateful for the help I received because it started me on the upward  path of straightening my life out while I learned, always by experience.  I try to have no place for guilt or shame.  I do acknowledge that as I am absolutely honest with myself – and  continuously trying to become my authentic self –  emotional freedom is my reward.   I am always working to ‘get there’… never to  ‘arrive’.   I know,  if I ever think I’ve finally “got it”, the Universe will promptly give me an adequate nudge to show me otherwise!  I’m beginning to think living my life is a process of repetition, acknowledging new information, accepting ongoing change, and working through challenges as they appear….always being grateful for everything I have and am privileged to experience.   Summarily, in this process  I know my best effort is good enough.

There is  incalculable joy and self-worth that inflates me with each truth I acknowledge to myself…..and if  any experience of mine can be eye-opening to another I’m happy to share it.

HALLOWEEN NEARS  AND YET ANOTHER MASK REMOVED!

BOO!!

BOO!!   It’s not that scary!