For the past four days I’ve been working hard in the mornings. Sagebrush and weeds!!! Sagebrush is prickly, difficult to work with, and unsightly! And the weeds…they’re green, healthy, thrive from the monsoon rains, and they’re not grass! All part of ‘ranching’! I think to myself, “you’re not in the city…you’re in the country, you don’t want a pristine place, but WHAT DO YOU WANT?”
This is the privilege of living: what DO I want? This I ask myself countless times a day. Sometimes the answer is reflected by the choices I make without the obvious question prodding me. It’s the spontaneous living in the NOW. I believe I’m being led on the latest path I have chosen. I try not to get frustrated, and certainly not discouraged, but it is a ‘puzzlement’ when tackling something absolutely new. I find I’m relying upon many of the things I have written or said that have to do with my spiritual practice. I rely upon trust, faith and a knowing that it all will unfold in good time. I always see progress and I have considerable satisfaction from my accomplishments.
I have joy in my heart. Out of the unknowingness of it all, I have a confidence all is as it’s meant to be. I have evoked within myself another level of consciousness because I am not coasting…I’m instigating. In my unknowingness, I’m more conscious than ever about my choices and decisions. I am more alive in my living! Life is pleasantly serious…more consciously decisive.
Responsibility is a good thing. It provokes taking care of myself as a human being, a friend, and a mother; my darling little dog, Porter; my house and land; my car…and it keeps me focused on my thoughts. Responsibility can’t be a burden when I honor the choices I make. Something positive is growing inside me as I reckon with the astonishing results of my expanding experience. I have more gratitude for the privilege of attending to that which makes demands upon me. This is the polishing of my life.
Blessed Be. To All Be Blessed.
All is well…as it is. ~Gaya
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