I’ve never liked platitudes…they’re so wishy-washy, don’t really say anything to any point…just words of response with no sincerity or comfort or solution behind them.   They  miss the mark of Action and Feelings and Understanding and Compassion.  They’re so aloof and cold, so general.   Of course, this is My Opinion!

I had a friend years ago who said to me she never worried about me because I was so strong and a survivor, and I could always take care of myself..  All true, but what was the point of saying anything?  I wasn’t comforted…my life hadn’t magically changed because I heard her words of supposed encouragement and understanding.  I already knew everything she said!  She had known me for years, but what she DIDN’T KNOW was she  had  set my bar higher so I had to appear even stronger and more capable as a struggling young single mother of two who constantly worried about having enough money, or even food sometimes, and who prayed my rattletrap of a car would not break down.  To me, her distancing comments were sideways, and allowed her a wide berth to not have to ask me how I was doing, or if everything was going okay.

Time heals all wounds…Don’t worry, things always get better…He’ll grow out of it..You can handle it…Life isn’t fair…Life isn’t what it’s cracked up to be…They’re always thorns with the roses…You can’t always be a winner…No one ever said life was easy…It’s a great life if you don’t weaken…Smile and the world smiles with you, cry and you cry alone…You made your bed, you sleep in it…forgive and forget….This always happens…When it rains it pours…Another day another dollar…Into each life a little rain must fall….It always gets better….Don’t worry, you’ll get over it…and too many more!

I don’t want to be a person who uses platitudes in response to another’s difficulty in their life.  I want to be part of a solution to any problem someone might be having…. or, at the very least, show my interest and concern to their plight.  I want to try to relieve or soften, if I can, a person’s suffering or sadness …I want to reach the heart of another to show them how deeply I care…  I want to touch the shoulder, hold a hand, look at the person straight in the eye, to show them my level of caring and sincere inquiry, how can I help?  What do you need?  I want to make the effort to listen and try to understand.

It has always been very easy for me to speak to a stranger…I really don’t have much fear of contact.  I am proud to say I have had wonderful conversations with “David”, my homeless friend whom I run into from time-to-time in front of my store.  But, I don’t think I’m doing enough to show to my “World Island” how interested I am in another’s world.  I want to be a human being who is connected to others, not disconnected.

The next time I ask someone “How are you?”, I’m going to listen very hard and long for the answer.  “Fine” will not do it!…I’m going to ask another question, I’m going to make sure that I have an exchange to show my sincere interest in this person, OR WHY HAVE I ASKED THE QUESTION IN THE FIRST PLACE?  After all, when I am asked a question, I give an honest straightforward response.  I will spend those few minutes valuing the experience of this human connection, and if nudged, ask  “Is there anything I can do?”…. I will  extend myself.  I think this is the very least I can do.

Everyone counts….and I never want to be ignorant to another who has been counted out!  To my mind, the act of omission is far greater than the act of commission.

There are  times I must put my nose in someone else’s business!