Intuition

I’ve mentioned from time-to-time how I belong here in Arizona…I’ve felt this way from the time I flew over Phoenix when I arrived for my first visit over 50 years ago. My eyes swelled with tears as I stared below through the aircraft window.  I felt like I was coming home, and had no reasonable explanation for these feelings.

This phenomenon happened every time I flew into the city, and each time I left.  I visited several times for many years  and these feelings never changed.  Happy to be home, and always sorry to leave.   In the early 60’s,  I lived here for almost four years.  My two sons were born here.

When I eventually moved here in 1990, it was my final return!  I had spent  years  yearning and planning and dreaming of getting back here and never leaving again.  This time I came by car with the moving van following behind.  I had a home to move into, and couldn’t wait to get into it!  My oldest son (now deceased) drove with me for good reason.  I was  bringing a dog and a cat, and his company was wanted and needed in so many ways.  It turned out to be one of the nicest times he and I ever spent together and this experience is a fond memory  I revisit often.

I arrived in early Spring, and  spent that Summer walking the desert exclaiming “Thank you God, Thank you God!”, and very nearly went broke!.  I was self employed and kept putting off getting my business up and running.  Thankfully, I ‘came to my senses’ and redirected myself; after all, this was no vacation anymore! I was here permanently now, and began to wrap my mind around that fact!  I was finally  home for good!

I reference drums because from day one, I’ve always felt an affinity to the Native American culture.  In fact, when my first son was born, I had hired a young woman from the Hopi nation.  I can’t remember her face, but I have never forgotten her name.  Somehow she felt ‘familiar’ to me.  I’ve been to some ruins, and each time I visit, it’s like I ‘remember’….I have  music of Incan Pan Pipes, Native American Flute….. hauntingly beautiful sounds that stir thoughts in my mind of a time my soul has known.  Sometimes when I walk, I begin chanting in the tribal way, and I can tell when I am sounding to my happiness or my sorrow.

This is the first occasion I have shared any detail along these lines about me.  I think it’s time because I’ve been noticing that I’m stirring inside….I’m continuing on my spiritual path, my intuitive nature is surfacing more, and I’m feeling  a oneness to my surroundings, my place on this planet and in this Universe.  I’m feeling very comfortable with this path I am following.

This morning, from out of nowhere,   I said something to myself (out loud, which is  not unusual), that startled me.   Instantly, I retorted,  “This isn’t You!”…”Stop thinking and saying things like this when you know this isn’t the real you!”  …..and then I heard the drums in my mind….the steady beat…the comforting and familiar sound.  Something inside me has changed.  I know it is all good,  and I also know I must tread slowly, yet confidently.  Clearly, I am enjoying the newness of this.

Some of my friends who follow my blog might surely be surprised by this admission.  All I can say is yes, it’s me, the real me….little by little emerging from a new chrysalis.

My sense is, this stage of development occurs again and again in our lifetimes.   I believe I am gently unfolding and awakening to living my life with a new clarity of purpose by Divine Intention.

The Beauty of the Emergence of Living

The Beauty of the Emergence of Living

I try to hoof-it a mile a day in the morning as soon as it’s light…and when I return I’m  FULL OF IT!

Years ago, I used to call it my ‘sit and stare’…..a time at the table, sometimes in the dark, drinking buckets of coffee and smoking countless cigarettes, staring outward thinking and thinking (wasting no little time too).   This was a kind of meditation, but without much intent, or physical exertion for that matter!

Lots of water under past bridges.  Lots of knowledge received in my spiritual “questing”.   Now I’m able to bring myself into a different kind of awareness.  It’s absolutely deliberate, admittedly, not ‘by the book’.     When I walk, as I’m building my stride,  I’m actually waiting to be ‘informed’.  Yes,  I receive my ‘information’  during  my walks (and in the shower as well  [I’ll not be saying “Come… take a shower with me”, however!]).  When I dodge my daily walk, I always  feel significantly out of kilter.

This morning,  I noticed  a much looser gait.  I felt my hip movement was more fluid and less stiff.   I intuitively knew I should “loosen up” in my thinking and rigidity!  Another reminder  not to be so black and white, judgmental or critical.  My internal feelings absolutely acknowledged this message instantly.  As I continued on, my stride began to lengthen, there was a quickness to my step, and although the humidity was quite high, I didn’t feel impeded.  I felt lightened…. wanting to begin a mild jog.  (This was a cautionary whim considering my age!)

Exhilaration!…the thrill of it…the peace in it…my gratitude for the heads up!

I just came in from outside.  We’re expecting lots of rain in the next 36 hours, and my hounds have dug a couple big holes out there.  I don’t want puddles next to the house!  Out I go to dig them in……What’s that?

YET ANOTHER WINK AND  NOD FROM THE UNIVERSE!

I'm pooped!

I’m pooped!

Now it's raining!

Now it’s raining!

It's tough goin'

It’s tough goin’

Enuf' already!

Enuf’ already

ENTIRELY TOO MUCH ‘INFORMATION’ FOR ONE DAY…. BUT THERE ARE NO MORE HOLES EITHER!