What an eye opener!  Why do tears erupt without warning anyway?  Why, when something joyful happens can I be brought to tears?  Why, when I see an intimate love scene in a movie do I erupt with emotion?  Why, when the horses are running am I crying as they pass the finish line?  Where is this emotion coming from within me?  What is my Soul trying to tell me?  Am I reacting to some guilt or shame?  I don’t think so.  Am I longing for the warm feelings of demonstrative love?  Am I dealing with pent-up love  inside me that I haven’t been able to express all these many years?   Have I come to overflow…  Are these unpredictable tears a spilling out of the love inside me that triggers when I witness feelingful emotional events?  If so, I need to level my playing field!

When have I felt authentic love?  When have I felt someone loved me just for me? Unconditionally?  Good questions, all.

Now my work begins!   Mindful of the mirror, now I really begin to go inside.  It feels like a slippery slope, but I have to admit, there’s a stir within me to get that worm can opened.  I know whatever I discover is not worth keeping under wraps!

Living alone as I have for many years does create biased ways of looking at some things.    The floodgates of my emotions have opened, and  I don’t feel at my wits’ end….I don’t feel crazy….I’m not in a fetal position of fear. I’m  wide-eyed and bushy-tailed and ready for bear….even my oft’ referred- to Kodiak one!

What perfect timing…day before my New Years Eve tradition.   The very time I treasure to be ‘at rest as I encounter my life’.  How exciting!  Lots to think about and try to figure out….not going to happen overnight, of course.   I am experiencing a huge relief in knowing I am pursuing to my greatest good.

AND SO IT IS!