Self-Consciousness

I CHOOSE To Be In Stillness Sometimes

September 19, 2023 / / Awareness, Energy Connection, GAYA, Life and Living, Our Essence, Peace and Understanding, Presence, Self-Consciousness, Silence

These days I’m choosing to sit in stillness more…and I’m trying to accomplish something for doing it:  I want to  place myself  in a state of consciousness.  In doing this, I’m silently communicating with who I am in this silence.

This is an unguided experience so I can’t be concerned if I’m doing it ‘right!’  It’s an action by me with me.

I don’t think Living is just all about doing an overt action or speaking out loud. I’m learning that it has a great deal to do with the silence involved because in silence there is perfect calm along with wakefulness and deliberate intention too.

Meditation is similar to this, but it isn’t the same somehow. With meditation I begin with trying to sit in the silence and quiet my mind.  When I go to this place of finding consciousness, I am hearing sound (I ring a chime), and then deliberately follow the sound until I do not hear it anymore.  I guess I can liken it to ‘white noise’ when I have TV on in the background.  Eventually, I am working around the house and don’t even hear it anymore unless I deliberately go stand in front of the TV and put my attention to it.

This is another concept about deliberate effort while living. I am realizing that I have been ‘living by the basics’…the rules and definitions that have been taught to me…the Human side of me. I’m finding out that there is so much more  about my existence and it doesn’t have a thing to do with neighbors or friends, or what I’m eating or wearing or where I’m planning to go or what I’m planning to do when I get there!

My little dog, Porter, shows me how this is done too.  He’s very active and wants my attention especially early morning when we get up.  He sort of pesters.  Then, after a while, he simply lays down by my feet and goes into his own silence.  He’s undisturbed while I’m working at the computer.  He remains in his own silence and consciousness and he isn’t concerned about me or himself at all until I get up from my chair.

So, what do I conclude in sharing this with you?  The stillness in my life brings me in touch with ME, my real beingness…and this concept is totally removed from ME, Kaye A. Peters. I don’t have an identity when I do this…I am part of all life which isn’t speaking to itself, it just exists..it just IS.

Blessed Be.  To All Be Blessed.

You find your Peace and Understanding in your own good time.   ~Gaya

   

I’m Grateful for Just a Glimmer!

November 11, 2020 / / Conscious Awareness, GAYA, Mindfulness, Our Essence, Presence, Self-Consciousness

I’ve been known to say, “Have joyful thoughts”, “Think thoughts of happiness”, “It is your happiness and joy that you search for”…or the like. These phrases sound so glib to me now.

It was early evening yesterday when I was thinking…that thing we do unceasingly every waking hour.  This time I was consciously communicating with myself.  My thoughts weren’t random, reactionary thoughts…they were orderly and I knew I was trying hard to come to some kind of a conscious conclusion.

I agreed that at this seasoned time of my life I am well able to reason how I go about releasing and letting go of troublesome thoughts and how difficult this process can be.  I agreed that initial  Gratitude for everything I have  is a good place to start.  But then, as I looked around the room I realized there was a deeper meaning I was searching for, and it was the simplest thought of all:  What I really want is to feel good.  I want to feel good from the moment I get up in the morning.  I want to feel good in spite of what’s going on around me.  The song, “Whistle While You Work”  from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs came to mind.  Such a light and happy song it is, and as Snow White began to clean up the cottage, all of the dwarfs began to help as they all sang.

One thought led to another and I felt inside me how  Attitude  together with Gratitude are prerequisite.  Then I thought, it is I who creates these thoughts…these feelings…it is all about me and what I choose to feel about everything.   I recalled how daydreaming was the way I had created so many wonderful feelings…I was always feeling good when I was ‘planning out’ a dream or goal, or just plain imagining a scenario which made me feel so fantastic, so powerful.

We think we know how to bring ourselves away from unpleasantness.  Usually, we resort to complaining about it. Venting maybe feels like we’re getting it out of our system, but really, it’s only letting it resonate deeper within us through our continuous attention to it.  Or, we go to the refrigerator, or go shopping, or take a drink, or whatever else we can think of to override how bad we are really feeling.

IT’S MY CONSCIOUSNESS which will do it all for me with ease, if I let it. It is  my mind over  the matter…my deliberate conscious choice to take the bull by the horns and make the committed decision to bring myself down the path of feeling good no matter what is happening, no matter what my pain.  It is the true release and  deliberate letting go of the thought process which EGO lays on me!  It is the EGO which supplies all the reasoning why I must do and feel the way I do so I can always come out on top, I must always be right… be the best!  It’s the EGO which has to win!  But, I am not my EGO!!

I’m trying not to make this subject complicated.  I am trying to get in touch with my own innocence.   I’m trying to recognize my essence. I’m refusing to be tainted by outside influence which has nothing to do with me unless I allow it to penetrate my thinking.  I’m trying to see the peace and calm amidst a storm which I don’t have to acknowledge.  I am an individual and also part of the collective.  It is my individuality which carries my consciousness and personal well being.  It is truly what I want to believe is the best way for me to go that will support my own peace and calm as I settle inside myself.  Public opinion doesn’t count when it comes to my inner peace and calm.  It’s like the feelings of jealousy and envy which are not innate  to every human being.  These feelings are self-created.  Same goes for dissatisfaction with life and circumstances.

I’m giving myself the challenge to feel good about myself and what I am doing with each day that I have been gifted to live.  I’m going to listen for the good, the positive and uplifting.  I’m going to do what makes me happy and what makes me feel good.  Joy and Happiness spring from those inner feelings of Goodness and Contentment.  Spontaneous random acts of kindness toward myself and others is pure love in action. I have five God-given senses and my conscience to seek out the good in everything and I will trust my Intuitive Wisdom.

Blessed Be.  Stay Safe and Be Well.

Life is to be enjoyed, not feared.  It is a smooth stream of experience

when choices are made which feel good from within your heart.   ~Gaya

 

 

Life Is All My Perspective – Instructions to Self

April 22, 2019 / / GAYA, Honoring Intention, It's all in the Energy, Living in the NOW, Mindfulness, Self-Consciousness

It’s  a Monday, first day of 365 of  a work week of 52, in a month of 12, which makes up a year… all keeping up with time I claim doesn’t really exist!  I even entitled a chapter in my second book, The Book of Kaye (I AM), “All the time we have is all the time we need.”

This almost sounds like a riddle.  We take time out of our days to do something else, we stretch time to finish a project, we keep track of time as a measure of fulfillment  (baking a cake, finishing college, reaching scheduled appointments, etc.), we regret wasting time, and  yet, we claim we never have enough time.  For something that I claim doesn’t exist in space, I’m using time right now to express myself.

I sit here drinking my ginger-lemon tea, not knowing exactly what’s coming up for my ‘day fill’, and already I can sense I’m wondering about it.  Why wonder?  I live in the NOW!  I’m drinking tea NOW so there’s no going beyond that!  Furthermore, I’m writing a blog about it, so that’s about all of  the ‘NOW’ IN THIS ‘TIME’ I can handle!

And, what about rushing  around ” like a chicken with it’s head cut off”, or multi-tasking,  and all those birds we try to kill with one stone?

No wonder we have phrases like “Stop and smell the roses”, or “Slow down”, “Easy does it”,  “Savor the moment”, and so many more.

When all is said and done, I’m the one who is doing all of this to myself.  It’s for my pleasure I guess…something in my thoughts is giving me the ‘rule’ or the ‘direction’.  Now, I am reminded I recently mentioned in a live stream I was becoming more self-conscious because I was more aware of my thoughts and intentions. This is exactly why I am writing this blog.  To open myself  to more insight and shed more light upon my darkened corners.

I want to enjoy the privilege of living my life with as much peace and joy and thrill as possible.  With this in mind, I want to lose track of time altogether and pull myself inward to the awareness of really ‘being in the moment of the doing’. If I don’t get to it…So What?  All the more reason to Savor what I am into.

   Cherish every single moment as the most important. 

You don’t have to figure out anything more beyond this.  ~Gaya