Consciousness

What on earth?!  I’m imagining  butterflies emerging from the chrysalis flying around me in all different colors – the most prevalent is the Monarch, the King of butterflies; common to many, strong as strong, making its migration every year in concert rhythm to nature’s symphonic overture to a new life.  This butterfly has four stages in its life cycle, and lives four generations in one year.  I am not intending a primer on the life of a butterfly, but I intimately  understand the association with it to starting a new life and freedom.

For years I have associated every significant event as a life within my life.  Considering this,  I have lived many  lives in these almost 80 years of [this] life.

Summarily, in the past 18 months alone I can include another 5 or 6 lives!   I’d be hard-pressed to try to total all of these lives from,  let’s say, 3 or 4  years old – the beginning of my memories –  moving to different houses, attending different schools, growing up and starting college, my many jobs, creating my executive search firm, 3 marriages, two children, 3 divorces,  and so on and so on.  I’m sure it could reach over 60!  Not surprising, then, at this particular time of my life there are butterflies in my mind!  My goodness, what a life cycle I am having!

Ever-new experiences, living my freedom, fulfilling myself in honor to my creator, the Universe, of which I am a part and in which I thrive as a spiritual being in a human condition,  IS my existence……my privilege of living life.

There is no net that can gather me up, nor crush my essence.  There is no word that can quench my words of my own truth.  I will always view my life as perpetual cycles of newness… more growth and more enlightenment.    I will continue to emerge always beautiful and stronger.  The Phoenix rises from the ashes……. the butterfly emerges from the chrysalis.

…..One and the Same to Me!!  Blessed Be to All.

 

 

Elevator Story, Second Floor, Baby Steps, there’s no going back, and it must come from my heart!

I’m on a journey, that’s for sure, and there’s no sense in running!  I get it…there are good days, really good days, and days bad enough to make me feel like I’ve fallen down the shaft!  Not so though!

This is my story, and if I look back to my history, that’s how I got to where I am right now!  Rocky roads don’t mark failure for  me…they’re Blue Ribbons of Success…as long as I stay on the road!   Feeling, living, thinking, receiving inklings of progress, and sensing those assuring nudges along the way to ‘keep on keeping on’…That’s what this is all about for me!  I love that phrase:  Keep On Keeping On!  I can see the glow coming from the Pot o’Gold!  I continuously drink the half-full glasses of lemonade, and whenever I try to read the clouds, there’s always a stream of silver coming straight for me!

I’m pursuing Life’s Path…diligently trying to find some sense of purpose and order for my life while I’m on this planet.  It’s so exciting, scary, unknown, unfamiliar, unending…so many ‘uns’…will I ever reach some kind of plateau of ‘semi’-consciousness?  Come to think, I may be in the state of ‘consciousness’ right now!  My sense is that there is more!  I’m resonating with new authors who subtly lead me to new vistas…I’m consuming information almost by osmosis sometimes.  New friends have appeared offering their knowledge and perspective.  Puzzle pieces keep fitting into place, and I have some WOW moments of encouragement.

I am so very grateful to be able to summon my courage to write this for anyone who may find it interesting and helpful to their own experience.

I’m searching for real peace:  It’s about authenticity.  The real space I’m meant to inhabit and enjoy; the love I have for myself and others; to quietly be whom I am meant to be and find and serve out my purpose in this world.  It’s a process of hard work and brutal self-honesty, toward continuing enlightenment and fulfillment, with spurts of exhilaration beyond measure that accompany my journey.

I’ve enrolled in Life’s University…My diploma:  New Peace…New Understanding.

My Life Formula continues to prevail:  Intention + Effort =  Success

Birth of Consciousness

Birth of Consciousness

I’ve mentioned from time-to-time how I belong here in Arizona…I’ve felt this way from the time I flew over Phoenix when I arrived for my first visit over 50 years ago. My eyes swelled with tears as I stared below through the aircraft window.  I felt like I was coming home, and had no reasonable explanation for these feelings.

This phenomenon happened every time I flew into the city, and each time I left.  I visited several times for many years  and these feelings never changed.  Happy to be home, and always sorry to leave.   In the early 60’s,  I lived here for almost four years.  My two sons were born here.

When I eventually moved here in 1990, it was my final return!  I had spent  years  yearning and planning and dreaming of getting back here and never leaving again.  This time I came by car with the moving van following behind.  I had a home to move into, and couldn’t wait to get into it!  My oldest son (now deceased) drove with me for good reason.  I was  bringing a dog and a cat, and his company was wanted and needed in so many ways.  It turned out to be one of the nicest times he and I ever spent together and this experience is a fond memory  I revisit often.

I arrived in early Spring, and  spent that Summer walking the desert exclaiming “Thank you God, Thank you God!”, and very nearly went broke!.  I was self employed and kept putting off getting my business up and running.  Thankfully, I ‘came to my senses’ and redirected myself; after all, this was no vacation anymore! I was here permanently now, and began to wrap my mind around that fact!  I was finally  home for good!

I reference drums because from day one, I’ve always felt an affinity to the Native American culture.  In fact, when my first son was born, I had hired a young woman from the Hopi nation.  I can’t remember her face, but I have never forgotten her name.  Somehow she felt ‘familiar’ to me.  I’ve been to some ruins, and each time I visit, it’s like I ‘remember’….I have  music of Incan Pan Pipes, Native American Flute….. hauntingly beautiful sounds that stir thoughts in my mind of a time my soul has known.  Sometimes when I walk, I begin chanting in the tribal way, and I can tell when I am sounding to my happiness or my sorrow.

This is the first occasion I have shared any detail along these lines about me.  I think it’s time because I’ve been noticing that I’m stirring inside….I’m continuing on my spiritual path, my intuitive nature is surfacing more, and I’m feeling  a oneness to my surroundings, my place on this planet and in this Universe.  I’m feeling very comfortable with this path I am following.

This morning, from out of nowhere,   I said something to myself (out loud, which is  not unusual), that startled me.   Instantly, I retorted,  “This isn’t You!”…”Stop thinking and saying things like this when you know this isn’t the real you!”  …..and then I heard the drums in my mind….the steady beat…the comforting and familiar sound.  Something inside me has changed.  I know it is all good,  and I also know I must tread slowly, yet confidently.  Clearly, I am enjoying the newness of this.

Some of my friends who follow my blog might surely be surprised by this admission.  All I can say is yes, it’s me, the real me….little by little emerging from a new chrysalis.

My sense is, this stage of development occurs again and again in our lifetimes.   I believe I am gently unfolding and awakening to living my life with a new clarity of purpose by Divine Intention.

The Beauty of the Emergence of Living

The Beauty of the Emergence of Living