Contentment

Forget the masks!  They’re chicken feed compared to what I’m uncovering now!  I don’t want to be a fighter anymore!  I don’t want to be a defender of who I am, anymore!  I do want to be A “softie”…I have absolutely nothing to fear and I know this NOW!

To all who may have followed me thus far, we know when I declare “I am a strong woman”,  this is more than an identity I have given to myself.  It is the beginning of ‘the greatest defense to a good offense!’  I am fitting my own battle of Jericho!

Because of a series of events recently in my life, and profound awakening  I now recognize and acknowledge, I am ready to get down to the WHYS and WHAT happened way back when in my childhood that taught me how to put up The Great Wall….never to be devastated to that extent again!

 I’ve been so tightly wound up, it is like a riddle of my own life if I’m ready to unwind myself back to ‘wherever’…and as I write these words, I am smiling and cradling myself in my own arms, knowing everything is quite okay and peaceful wherever I find myself landing.

Vulnerable…Naked…Bare…Defenseless.   I am now more able to share this space with  Nonchalant…Relaxing into it…resting in the lesson(s) that are offered me now to my greatest peace of all!

Suddenly, weights have lifted; so much seems ridiculously simple and easy to discard; it’s like I have just said to myself, “”WOW, how could this have been so simple, and how is it that it has taken me 80+ years to get to this place?!”

Keep it Simple!  YES!  Just Do it!  YES!  It Doesn’t Matter!  YES!  Inner Peace!  YES!   To Absolutely Know what ‘GO WITH MY FLOW’ really means!  YES!  Yes, Oh Yes, I Know what ‘IT IS BETWEEN ME AND ME’ means NOW!  YES!  And the list goes on.

It’s my way to explode with what I feel at the time – and this blog is no exception.  It’s not the be-all-end-all with all my answers, NO IT IS NOT!  But, it is my willingness to crack open my human shell and again, peer through myself to that other side where there may just be nothing…other than my mind’s view…my own thoughts which I have created justifying my existence.  Even this doesn’t really matter in the long run.   I hope I will soon learn there is no need to raise my voice again.  I hope I will soon learn there are times I can easily be quiet.  And, I hope I will always enjoy the privilege of using my voice to speak my truth in my own space in this time.

Blessed Be.  To All Be Blessed.

 

 ‘God Willing and the Creek Don’t Rise’,  this coming April, another photo will take its place on the Blog Mantle!  Yes, make no mistake, I think these pictures are pretty good.  BUT, irrespective of everything from the Ego side of things, there’s a lot of gratitude in my smile; there’s still a lot of sparkle in my eyes,; there’s a thump to my heart and I’m still filled with Joy as I continue to enjoy the privilege of living my life.

I am about to publish my second book.  Who ever would  have thought (least of all me), that I would accomplish this?  So, having not conceived the thought of it yet, I was actually living in the NOW before I was introduced to The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle, and Life did, indeed, present me with writing these books, and learning so many other things that continue to serve me  well as I ferret out areas of my beingness that require smoothing and honing and excavation, working toward  that pearl in my Life Oyster.

I’m doing life by the ‘seat of my pants’..so to speak –  Whatever feels comfortable to me and resonates familiar.  Leopards don’t change their spots!  People are always who they are and luckily, we can figure out things we aren’t so fond of in our character upon which we can improve.  I am carrying the rights to certain wisdom in my years now because I have figured out that whatever I chose to do in my lifetime, were choices which brought me to outcomes where I took lessons at those given times and applied them to future experience – and even now at 80+ years of age, I still employ relative and current lessons and use them as gateways to even greater positive self-fulfillment.   It’s sort of like ratcheting myself along my Forever Path and it has become easier and more interesting because there are people, places and things which point themselves out to me and often I am able to see the Blessings and Gratitude I have for having recalled the useful lessons.

There are two phrases that have become prominent to me:  “I love it when a plan comes together!”,  (taken from a popular TV show) and “Works for me!”

There is a lot to be said for a peaceful feeling.  I believe it is the responsibility to myself to find contentment and understanding within the world that I chose to enter all those many years ago for my Soul Purpose.  And, I believe I will be entering again and again for years and years to come.    It is interesting how ‘pain body’ works – ‘memory’ of times and events of my past experiences which erupts and hopefully nudges me to delve that much deeper into my response to what Life is presenting to me.  I accept I chose to come to these experiences.  For me, this is where the awareness and enlightenment emerge as I examine my reactionary responses.  I know my energy of good and honest intention will be returned to me by my Universe toward a positive outcome and to my greatest good.

I AM in this experience NOW.  Blessed Be.  To all be Blessed.

I DON’T LIKE COMPLAINING AND I DON’T LIKE COMPLAINERS!

Each person has their own brand of quarreling when it comes to their individual happiness.

I lived on the desert when I first moved to Arizona, 27 years ago…I liked the houses far apart.  I happen to like the ranchy look – hay bales, chickens in the yards, an old relic tractor standing out front and other memories of ‘how the west was won’ – maybe a wagon wheel (off a covered wagon, I hoped), and a horse barn topped it all off.  Soon enough contractors bought up lots of the land and before I knew it, housing developments started creeping in and ‘the look’ was gone.  At that time this was, perhaps, the most important thing happening in my life.  This may appear pretty shallow to some, but we’re speaking of my individual happiness here.  There was nothing I could do about the encroachment.  Another reason took me away, but for a fact, looking back those many years, I couldn’t have remained because the landscape changed more than I wanted to.

So, I come to this:  When I am disgruntled or dissatisfied with something, do I make a scene about it?  I’ve never questioned whether my behavior challenged any amendments of the United States Constitution.  I guess I’ve always felt I was free to do and say what I wished, trying not to cross personal boundaries (admittedly guilty at times), or violate laws.  Many have cautioned me through the years to keep my opinions to myself, insinuating that my opinions may cause dissension among family members, perhaps, or maybe just plain embarrassment for others.  I don’t believe I ever felt I was challenging ‘the establishment’.  Exercising who I was as a person was never a ‘statement of my freedom privilege’.

These days I am trying first to be true to myself, to my ideals, my principles, my integrity.  Since my son took his life almost 6 years ago, I became more serious about almost everything that pertained to me.  I became even more introspective.  I began to subjectively take areas of my life that I knew I disliked, and I decided to do whatever it took to make the changes within myself that would benefit me and everyone around me.  This is work, but it’s worth it.  I’ll tell you something – there really hasn’t been much time for my mind to be distracted by others’ drama (and there’s plenty to notice) while I keep my nose to my own grindstone.

Many defend their actions based on principle.  It’s everyone’s right to defend their principles.  The question is, does it have to be a public statement?  Or, can it be no different than when we do a good deed for another when no one is watching and we don’t mention it later either?  Can it be done in the confines of our home as we teach our children what we think is right and honorable?

Everything we do gives us learning lessons.  Human beings have been living by the trial-and-error method forever.  It seems we can be very stubborn and self-absorbed.  Thankfully, there seems to be evidence of a slight shift of the heart.  Are people finally beginning to see the dynamic between their level of self-love and self-care as it relates to their ability and level of care and concern that they are capable of having for anyone else around them?  Unmistakably there is the correlation, and no attempted change of anything on the outside can happen until change on the inside takes place.

I have so many ideals and ideas I want to consider, all to the end of my own self-fulfillment and awareness around my privilege of living the best life I can live.  I’m proactive for me.  I am no stoic.  I am a freedom fighter and I have never felt my rights have been violated.

I think it is a huge privilege of life in these United States to earn hundreds of thousands – even millions – of dollars a year, playing the sport one loves to play.  I’ve never heard of any racial discrimination toward anyone who can play the game exceptionally well.

Personal decorum, decency and dignity – very personal, indeed.  I am entitled to my opinions, and I make no judgment –   neither does Karma.  Blessed Be All.

 

  

The longer I live…the more I seem to learn….or, is it the more I remember?  This is a good question!

I have been thinking a lot lately.  I’m facing a milestone birthday of the chronological length of time I have been on this planet [this go-around, anyway]; I have been reflecting more on a lot of different things.  Putting pieces into better place in my Life Puzzle, and also sifting through some of my CONSISTENT GRATITUDES that have lingered with me throughout my life,  because they are HUGE sighs of relief (relief that I ‘made it through’ some of the not-so-good experiences I chose to have)!

Let’s take people who have come into, stayed, and then left during my life.  There are memories that spring into action as I muse the first time I met them, and the last time I saw them or spoke with them.  Most represent a long span of time, and my first impressions are definitely not my last impressions!  No sadness, nor resentment…more, my feelings are, again, gratitude that they came and stayed, then disappeared,  by both of our choices.  People change.

There are others, however,  although newer relationships, that now linger with a sweetness of heart – a kind of love, if you will – that reached me at yet another depth, and grabbed those strings that play the fervent melodies.  Passionate Life Chords that I know play more of a fulfillment of my Being.  (Hard to explain, but I’m trying.)   It must be that I can identify and treasure these feelings because I am ‘ready’ by virtue of my own maturity and increasing spiritual understanding.  It is I who pursue this side of my life now – it is I who have the fervor within me and I want everything I can garner in this lifetime toward my joy, happiness, and peaceful fulfillment.

How many times I have said,  I ENJOY THE PRIVILEGE OF LIVING MY LIFE!  This statement means more every time I utter the words.

IMPRESSIONS!  Whatever makes an impression of any kind, COUNTS! I welcome my pensive feelings as I write my message this day.  I love that I have come in touch with mySelf in this way today.

I AM ALIVE!   

 

So, I rise and shine early most mornings, and I’m filled with an excitement for what’s to come this day and every day.   Pretty amazing – this feeling of looking for the corner to peek around.

When I use the word “thrill” in no way do I associate it with a roller coaster ride!   I’m always fulfilling a dream or goal that has been swirling around in my brain.  Case in point, I am now in the throes of trying my best once again – without any push and shove – to fulfill THE dream of 75 years!  Yes, I’m planning to make an offer on a property that will, indeed, become my DreamCatcher Ranch!  The very ‘ranchy thing’ I’ve often referred to in videos and in other blogs.

When the stars are aligned and the Universe brings to us what we’ve been putting ‘out there’, suddenly what I have been picturing in my mind’s eye has appeared!  This is the biggest thing to wrap my head around and now, at nearly 80, I just may be finalizing a huge piece of mySelf, and on the heels of it, I already have the ideas for the projects that will take me onward toward more goals.  There’s a gorgeous Western mountain view toward the sunsets, and early morning sunrises will open my days.  Peace and tranquility, coupled with excitement and curiosity for everything I put in front of me, will hurl me to yet another Forever Path.

I hope  readers will follow my facebook page, Just Sayin’   Kaye A. Peters, where I’ll be updating my progress and experience on this journey and I’ll continue my personal life saga when I make the actual move.  Follow me – I have a young heart and I’m full of adventure and joy….like I’ve said, I always enjoy the THRILL of the chase – and when I’m officially  on this high ride – when the papers are signed, the “For Sale’ sign is in my front yard, and hopefully a ‘SOLD’ sign soon to follow,  I’ll continue chasing my dreams and goals.  One way or another, I love the privilege of living my life –  the thrill in and of itself – always.

I’m coming!….can’t wait to hear the howl of the coyote in the distance and the SILENCE.  Blessed Be to All.  And So It Is, And Will Be.

Until recently, I thought I understood the theory of ‘mirroring myself in another’,  I.e., when I become  acutely aware  what I dislike in someone, I’m recognizing a quality  I inherently dislike in myself!  And, when I’m  unexplainably  attracted to someone (male or female) I’m recognizing  traits in that individual that I like in myself!  Sounds simple, albeit annoying!   In these processes,  more than once I’ve been reprimanded for my ‘judgmental’ approach in my criticisms.  Conversely,  I’ve never been complimented  for my ‘judgmental’ favoritism.  Just sayin’.

Consider the word, “discernment”….in my view, this is the independent ability to make decisions about people and things that don’t have to do with mirroring anything….it’s simply an individual’s right and  choice to decide,  based upon personal integrity and perceptions, that something is different [than preferred] and  make a decision accordingly.  Ergo, if I  don’t like public nose picking and view it as a disgusting display, so be it!!

How much house does a person need…. just because it is affordable?    I live in a small home…but admittedly, I’d like one somewhat larger and in a more desirable neighborhood or a ranch property!  This is my Ego talking.   I’m grateful for what I do have  –  a paid-up homestead!  I’m dancing around this admission already!….  knowing full well, I have one foot in the hot water!    Could I even feel ‘at home’ in a  3,000 sq. ft. space, or more?  I don’t think so.  Just as I don’t think I could have two or more places of residence and feel ‘at home’ in all of them equally.  Right now, everything I have in my home has an “attachment value”…I love all of it, as well as me in it…and there’s also a story connected to most everything inside these walls.  This is an outgrowth of downsizing, making my life simpler and less cluttered, more meaningful and special to my heart.   As I write these very words, I believe I’ve just solved a personal dilemma!  ( I do believe I’ve got it! [sic])  I’M FINALLY SATISFIED…. NO YEARNING FOR MORE!

STATS:

 GRATITUDE FACTION:  STEADY CLIMB

 SELF-IMPOSED SELF-ESTEEM RESTRICTION:

RESTRICTION:  O

SELF-ESTEEM:  STEADY CLIMB

Enough is Enough

Enough is Enough

I'll take One of Everything

I’ll take One of Everything

 

 

 

 

Never in a million years would I have thought I’d be giving credit to  Facebook for the  “teachers” whom I’ve encountered through their words.  I’ve  expressed myself in response… learned and integrated the likeminded ideas…. and finally, but without end, figured out  I like where I am today!

For an eternity  I’ve yearned for that beyond where I AM.  This kind of thinking isn’t so much about “things”, it’s more about being some place else….another house…another landscape…another massive project I haven’t been able to consider where I am!   I’ve been thinking “repairs” where I live now,  not enhancement, or development, or beautification.  Interestingly,  these very words are what I use when I look outside my environ when I consider what I would do with something or some place new!

This admission  is so big – almost overwhelmingly forthright and honest, I’m brought to my knees!  It has punched me in my gut!  What I’ve felt as dissatisfaction….. dis-ease, if you will… is really misinterpretation.   “Not Seeing the Forest for the Trees”!

Talk about an Ah Ha Moment!  This is an explosion of my mind!  It’s all about happiness, gratitude and relief, my personal Eureka!,  freedom and release from inhibiting, restrictive thoughts and ideas.

Another gate has opened up…I can see more of what “it” IS!

ANOTHER PIECE TO MY LIFE’S PUZZLE FITS INTO PLACE!

Step On It...Get On With It...Happiness Is....

Step On It…Get On With It…Happiness Is….