October 2018

I Love Hearing the Silent Sounds!

October 29, 2018 / / GAYA, Gratitude, Honoring Intention, Life and Living

Don’t ask me why and how I am truly moved to begin another blog…it’s those almost deafening ‘silent sounds’ that pull me to the page!

I’m hoofing again, and I think this has something to do with it!  I’ll never be able to explain how easily I can leave the hoof for so many months and then, when I return, it’s like I can’t figure out how I could have taken that hiatus from the activity that keeps me alive in so many ways!

It’s like my singing in the shower.  I know fully well why I started it up those 3+ years ago, and today, there is a fulfillment in it…almost a ‘swan song’, if you will, that screams to me silently, ‘You Did It, Kaye”!  I’ve always known what I was attempting to do and why I had set this goal inside of me.  It was all part of the onion-peel!  I knew what I was lacking and I had figured out a way I could slowly, but surely, bring it out of me:   Self-Confidence!   Now, it’s just plain pure pleasure when I let my ‘inside Angel’ loose as the water streams!

We told her this morning, she was meant to sing, speak and write and we are so happy for her and she is aware.  We found it comical and childlike.  She was four years old.  It was Christmas Eve in church with her parents…without any hesitation, she slipped from the pew and walked up to the front of the church and sang “Silent Night, Holy Night”, and then returned to her seat.  Pride, yet embarrassment, swept through her mother.  What a Blessing to Remember, Kaye.    ~Gaya

I enjoy my inspirations, and how I can muse to myself now with such clarity.  It’s hard to describe the peace and understanding that I feel and continue to enjoy every step on my Ladder(s) of Life.

My Ladder(s) of Life Progress are interesting:  I can easily come to a Vee.  I can move forward in certain areas of my life and then there are other areas which hold me as if I were in mud!  I always continue in both directions, and while I’m in the mud, I stay with it…trying for the breakthrough to veer back on the full-progress track.  Presently, my ‘mud’ is “Detachment”.  Loving those I love, while detaching from them in that love, and in this process enjoying the exquisite peace and understanding that as individuals we are duty bound to travel our own ways as we reach for our own successes and awareness.  Intellectually, I know this is attainable.  The integration of this whole concept takes its good old-fashioned time while the work continues.  I’ll share with everyone every step of ‘this way’.

Blessed Be.  To All Be Blessed.

 

 

FACE IT!

October 26, 2018 / / "Going for It", Energy Connection, Faith and Trust, GAYA, Life and Living, Peace and Understanding, Self-Realization

What’s in a face?  Why save face?  Why put on a happy face?  Face forward! Why use make-up to cover up the face?  There is nothing wrong with the REAL FACE!

A while back, in another exercise toward authenticity,  I was determined to strip away whatever labels I had attached to myself:  I went to a gym to strength train; I walked a mile in 18 minutes; I kept my weight pretty strictly between 130-132 pounds (and was proud of it!).  ALL…drum roll please…at the age of 78-80!  This was my picture of Kaye…I prided myself in it.  I had convinced myself this was part of the REAL ME!  “How Great Thou Art, Kaye”!

I’m getting better at recognizing when my  prideful EGO slivers into my consciousness and it is much easier to recognize and peel off  “that face, that face, that beautiful face”, and idle back to the ME that is  JUST ME!..The perfectly imperfect ME… the ME that I smile at every morning in the mirror  with fond recognition.  It’s more than  good enough for me, and that’s all that counts!

Facing facts  as I relax into my ‘easy peasey’ comfortable-with-ME space, I find I am far less concerned about what others are up to!  Everyone else can figure out their own stuff. It’s my peace I care about and my awareness that I’m continuously gaining because I do care more about me and love me more than anyone else.  I can be authentic around anyone, whether or not they are authentic with me.

Kaye has figured out that beneath ‘it all’, rests everything that is sweet and comfortable in her privilege of living her life to the fullest, and she knows it isn’t fancy, or loud or flashy, it is more on the mundane side of things because there is so much joy and happiness that extends to everything around and within her.  She has figured out that there is nothing specific that makes her happy.   She is happy for happiness’ sake.    ~Gaya. 

There is no question, I am working with another aspect of living in the NOW with myself.  I am more serious about what I have inside of me that must come out.  This isn’t necessarily about peeling my onion as much as it is about my Spiritual Nature, my Soul Self, my Higher Self.  I believe I have a Personal Emotional Guidance System and my consciousness wants a deeper connection to it.  I now have a sense that my innate ‘independent nature’ may well be that very System that has always been a part of my character.  I am on untread ground.  I am turning an unfamiliar corner far deeper within.  These aren’t answers carved in stone. This is how I pursue unanswered questions, as I stay interested and open waiting for answers.  ASK and I shall RECEIVE.

ABOUT FACE!!  BACK TO MY SPIRITUAL QUESTING!!

 

 

 

 

 

Perception…Reality! It’s all mine!!

October 19, 2018 / / Energy Connection, Faith and Trust, GAYA, I AM WHO I AM, Peace and Understanding, Self-Realization, Truth to Self

I will not allow my Joy to be snuffed by others’ actions! I will not allow my state of Beingness to be maligned by words from others’ mouths!  I am whole and complete…I am totally perfect at Essence, and I have been in the process of transformation since I became!

Yes, I am in perpetual  transformation, filtering information that comes to me through ‘intended sources’ which at perfect timing resonates with me, and I then begin to understand and integrate it into my whole SELF.

At 81+ years old, I am still at the tip of the proverbial iceberg. Slowly but surely I am melting into myself and I am seeing with more clarity.

Just what is it that stirs me..opening up my brain to see a little more of who I am?  Is it “Spirit” moving me?  Is it Source Energy…my Gaya…that finds a crevice to enter so I can see that bit more light that provides more answers?  I come to believe this day that I don’t have to name it! I just have to be aware that IT IS!  I believe because I feel the impact within,  I know I AM IN TOUCH WITH WHAT IS! 

I know there is much more and my unquenchable thirst thrusts me forward in my search…a Spiritual Addiction..meaningful only to me…slicing through me, letting all the air out of the balloon veils releasing and freeing me from the shackles of others’ dictates and judgments of who I am; my self-talk that restricts me from accepting I am made in the likeness of God, Source Energy, My Creator, The Universe...ALL THAT IS! 

Somehow, it  now seems so simple to be able to entertain this as truth, instead of holding on to all the other stuff that is negative and hurtful to me…which my EGO would have me do.  Yes, it is the EGO endlessly trying to devalue and foil me…it is EGO-PURPOSE.

I will be more conscious to enforce and reinforce my Essential Goodness.  My transformation will continue as I remind myself of my Spiritual Composition:  Love and Light.

It is in the awareness that transformation takes place.  There is a countenance of  internal understanding that pervades  and rests easy inside you, Kaye.  You have found, yet again, another piece of your ‘knowledge puzzle’.           ~Gaya

Blessed Be.  To All Be Blessed.

 

Think a little here…Think a little there…SEE A LOT!

October 10, 2018 / / GAYA, Life and Living, Living in the NOW, Peace and Understanding, Self-Realization, Truth to Self

Today I am coming face forward to something that I admit to myself I started as a seed thought well over a year ago!

What am I saying?  I’m trying to explain that I am witnessing the dynamic of just how the mind creates what it wants to see…and as long as that initial seed thought is there and germinating, the ‘workings from Source Energy’ are continuing toward the manifestation of this thought.

I can’t explain why I originated that seed thought…and believe me, I am honest with myself that I did, indeed, originate it!  It must be something from another life, is all I think it could be.  After all, when something or someone appears in our life…something or someone I have never known before in this life…there is a ‘lesson’ that is presenting to me.  Yes, a lesson is coming,  and I already know, it is my own integrity and honor and depth of character that is being tested.  I WILL MAKE IT!!!

No, Kaye, this is not from another life.  This is Your Essence bringing an experience to work through yet another lesson which needs to be dealt with, once and for all.  It is You, Kaye,  who has the propensity  either to ‘fall short’…or, as you say, “I will make it!!!”  You are acting out your own movie within the movie of this life and as We see, You are working through it successfully.   ~   Gaya

What a wonderment this blog has turned out to be for me!  I am the one who sits on my own shoulder monitoring carefully what goes on with me!  Call it Conscience or Wisdom or Character or Integrity or Honor or Truth to Self.  Yes, it’s Truth to Self.  

Little did I know when I began this journey of transformation  July 4, 2015, when Liferays.net was originated, what was in store for me.  Thankfully, I  have tried to come from my heart and in honesty the best I know how.  

Living in the NOW requires mindfulness and sincerity of purpose.  I have known this all along.  To be mindful means I have had to slow down…observe, not only my thoughts, but also that which presents to me.  Today’s awareness is an Acme of personal awareness.  It’s like I’m extinguishing a part of me…it’s letting go of something that I have been capable of doing which has never served me well.   As I write these very words, I feel extremely powerful in saying NO!  I WILL NOT GO DOWN THIS ROAD  AGAIN!  

I realize this may read as an unsolved mystery, but believe me, Another of My Mysteries Has Been Solved!  Another mask has been pulled off!   HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

Blessed Be.  To All Be Blessed.

Questions, Answers, and The Truth of it….As I Understand It.

October 2, 2018 / / GAYA, Grace, Gratitude, Honoring Intention, Manifesting our goals and dreams, Truth to Self

 

When I give my word, I want it to mean something.  Until this morning, I figured I wanted it to mean something to someone else.  When I make an appointment time, I’ll be there on time, or a bit before; when I say I’ll call you back, I’ll do so; when I say I’m here for you,   I WILL, I AM.  It’s important to me that I be a reliable person to another person.  I know this is part of my ‘integrity puzzle piece’.

This morning, it comes to me VERY LOUDLY,  do I care as much about keeping my word to myself?  On the surface, this seems like such a simple question/answer.  BUT, the picture I have in my mind’s eye has a much more far-reaching scope.

My word ties to my thoughts…My word has a subliminal message that is meaningful only to me…that is, if I want to dig a little for it.  My  ‘word’ actually has placed me at any given time in the setting of a day, week, month, or year(s) of my life.  My ‘word’ as it relates to self-talk, is the truth to myself…my opinion about myself, unless I am careful NOT to believe me!

She’s talking about the ‘unspoken word’.  The thoughts she knows she has had all of her life, her deep down thinking that she now knows confiscated her life for the time she bowed to mistakes in her assumptions about situations, and people.  The times she thoughtlessly participated in activities that were not in her best interests nor to her greatest good.  She is  resurrecting and excavating again to her authenticity how she could misguide herself by her lack of awareness that thoughts have cemented her to the result, as surely as the verbal words of intention, as she knows now  create her life every step of the way.                                                        ~  Gaya

It is important for me to ask the important questions to myself, and even more importantly, make sure I am giving myself the accurate answers.  I am my own parent and always have been, after I reached the age of majority and began to give myself permission.  I don’t want to trip any more than necessary; I want to be able to fully rely upon myself with clear intention.  

I guess when I look back, there really aren’t any surprises as to where I was at any given time…I was following my subtle dictates and desires and whims, without thinking twice as to the wisdom of my actions.  It’s again another Freedom of the Choices that I recognize now I will make with  more attention and clarity of mind toward my REAL INTENTION TO MY LIFE.

There really doesn’t have to be a ‘flip side’ to life, if I steadfastly hold onto the helm of my ship!  My internal compass knows exactly where I want to be headed.  No more unspoken words to myself!  I am capable of giving myself straightforward responses to my straightforward questions.  Straightforward from the heart receives straightforward from Source Energy, My Gaya.

Blessed Be.  To All Be Blessed.